I feel so tired, so drained. I don't know where I've been getting all the energy I have to last me for so long but I thank God that He has made a way and I am still in good health. I am beginning to dread the constant cycle of draining and refilling at a rate much more frequent than my hand phone battery. I just can't find the words to describe it. It's so difficult to balance reality with all the expectations from society and the people around me. I'm doing my best and I do need some time to rest, to relax and to enjoy what I used to enjoy doing. I hardly get any chance to go to east coast park any more. The only consolation is that I get to eat what I want most of the time.

Every day is like a game. I have to get from one place to another and complete certain tasks. It's not surprising that I just had time to realise how many days in the last few weeks I left home and got back home to find my mum sleeping. I want a good break to fully recharge. I want to do well but I'm just too tired at the moment.

I am seriously considering dropping at least one major commitment by the end of this year. Sure I can still cope with everything now but it is taking a very serious toll on me physically, mentally and emotionally. I am so tired. So tired.