I feel very tired. My duties are somehow all lumped together, with a wide break in between the avalanche of duties, making it even more tiring. Imagine a eight-man team being halved to four. On some days, it is effectively having a six-man team being cut down to two, with one person effectively not present. Five days straight of work, followed by a close cluster of duties that mixes up your day and night and mealtimes is definitely devastating to anyone.

Strangely, the last two band practices have been more enjoyable than that of the whole of this year, inclusive of concerts. I still feel that it is not enough yet. I want more. I want to learn and improve and not just play (and listen) the same thing over and over again (for the sake of the same few people).

I yearn for December to come but yet dread the arrival of October and November. How can this ever happen? It is so painful just to feel the days pass one by one and the intensity of stress increasing.

I feel tired. Let me rest.